Cleanse Day 6

E made it really easy not to have a drink last night. He has a tournament today and it's never a good idea to drink the night before.

I have officially surpassed the 5 day mark at which I caved last time I did this cleanse. I am now 55% done. It's amazing how long 5 days feels when you are restricting so much. I don't usually have a poor diet, but as soon as I "can't" have something, I want it x10.

Last night I ate, ate, ATE. I was insatiable.

Cleanse day 5

157.4

• 1st meal: pink lady apple and 1 T peanut butter
• 2nd meal: 2 boiled eggs, cheat 2 tsp veganaise, dill pickles
• 3rd meal: 1/4 c quinoa, cheat 1 tsp yumm sauce, nectarine 
• 4th meal: SNACK ATTACK. Serving raw almonds, 1.5 servings jerky, 1/4 c banana-PB "ice cream"
• 5th meal: black beans, zucchini, pepper, onion, garlic, salsa and quinoa
• 6th meal: cheat 1 square of 72% cacao dark chocolate and 6 oz of soy milk

3 CHEATS! But hot damn, if that's what PMS looks like from now on, I'm all in. I tracked all of this on MyFitnessPal yesterday, I managed to consume exactly what I was allotted for the day (1200cal), including the calories I earned on our walk/run (508cal). I had a 5 miler with sloooooooow puppy dog. In his defense, there were a lot of hills in there. I also did 30 boy push ups and a 60 second plank. Today will be 35 and a 70 second plank.

Those little additions of pure fat didn't do me any good, I went over 4 grams on fat, 9 on protein and 10 on fiber. 

Today, I am going to get my nails done and my eyebrows waxed, as a little reward for making it to the halfway point. I also will treat myself to a Passion tea from Starbucks (herbal, caffeine free, no sweetener). 

Then, I will be avoiding all of you like the plague, because it's Saturday. People like to eat and drink on Saturdays. I will not be avoiding my sisters tomorrow though. Katie invited me to BBQ and is so kind to incorporate food that I can eat. I just have to focus on keeping the booze out of my mouth. Shouldn't be too bad, I mean, it will be day 7! I'll only have 3 more to go!

Cleanse Day 6

156.4

I will answer to you tomorrow, hopefully with less cheats.

                                    GO DUCKS!!! 

Cleanse Day 5

I love to see the people around me start their journeys to health. It's really interesting to see the different avenues that they take.

To be completely, utterly and painfully honest though? It is sometimes quite hard for me to see them succeed with less effort than I. Of course I want them to succeed, be healthy and reach their goals, but it reminds me how stagnant I've been. I am always encouraging folks to join me at the gym and start eating clean and then it seems they have instantly surpassed me in health, fitness and weight loss. I know it seems like I'm being über competitive, but that's not it. It has a lot less to do with competition and a lot more to do with my personal disappointment in my lack of follow through.

E and I were actually discussing this last night, how I lack follow through. Sure I'm ambitious, but in a very hollow way. I whole-heartedly believe I am going to accomplish something and then as time saunters on, I lose it. The topic at large was the half marathon. I was talking out loud and questioning whether or not I have the capacity to follow through with it. I found training for the 10k and the 10k itself to be challenging, so the thought of a half is very intimidating. I still can't say whether or not I think it's realistic and I think that's an awful shame. He responded very simply with something like, "Follow through isn't something you're born with, it's groomed." This is where my stubborn nature gets a little bull headed. He's right of course, I need to start practicing completing things that I start.

I know that for me, sometimes it's very discouraging to see my friend's number dropping, when mine is remaining the same. There are a lot of things to consider here. First and foremost being that everyone is on a different journey. They have individual goals, personalities, body types, lifestyles and drive. Second being that when people first start losing weight, it happens much more rapidly than people like me, who have been losing/maintaining for 2 years. I have lost and maintained about 40 lbs over the past 2 years. That doesn't mean that I shouldn't lose an additional 20lbs, it just means that my body is very used to this game. Some of you can give up soda and lose 5 lbs.

I don't drink soda.
I don't eat fast food.
I eat very little processed food.
I only have a dessert, once a week.
I don't eat simple carbs.
My caffeine consumption is very low.

But when I fall of the wagon? I fall hard. Like take out for 5 nights in a row hard. I fell off the wagon when I picked Jacob up from the airport mid July... and have been struggling to climb back on, since. I didn't gain that much. I'm not overreacting, but rather trying to illustrate the battle that we fight every day. I'm not in this to only reach my goal weight. I want to live a long healthy life and look good doing it. My appearance is directly correlated with my psychological well being. I could work on this more, but that's the truth of where I'm at right now.

So I'm trying to climb back on the wagon with this cleanse. I feel like it's working, but I really need to watch myself and what I reintroduce when it's through.

When the scale drops to 149.9999999lbs I'm going to shamelessly cry. I've never seen that number.

After the cleanse is through, I need to get rid of my scale again and get into the habit of only weighing myself once a week. But for the cleanse, it's fun to see it drop. With the crystal clear understanding that most of the weight lost is from battling bloat and cleansing the colon.

Speaking of the cleanse.

Cleanse Day 4

• 1st meal: 1/2 personal watermelon
• 2nd meal: salmon "hash" and egg
• 3rd meal: leftover grilled cabbage
• 4th meal: left over lentil curry and hummus
• 5th meal: 3 small figs
• 6th meal: turkey stuffed bell peppers

These next 5 days are going to be tricky and my weight will probably be all over the place. I'm I should be starting my period any minute. I suppose I could have planned this cleanse a tad bit better. Oh well.

By the way, those peppers turned out AWESOME.

Turkey stuffed bell peppers

Serves 4 hungry people

• 1 lb lean ground turkey
• 4 bell peppers (i did yellow)
• 1 small packet taco seasoning
• 1 T minced garlic'
• 4 c raw kale
• 2 medium tomatoes
• 1/2 c chopped red onion
• 1 T olive oil
• 3/4 c veg broth
• salt to taste

optional:

• chopped almonds
• raisins
• jalapeños (seeds removed)
• cilantro

1. Remove seeds from peppers and grill at a low heat for about 12 minutes. Turning ever 4 minutes. 
2. Meanwhile, heat olive oil in a large skillet at a medium heat. Add turkey, kale, onion, taco seasoning, veg stock and salt. Cover. Stirring often.
3. Once the moisture has mostly steamed off, add garlic and optional ingredients. Stir and salt to taste.
4. Remove peppers from grill, should be soft and slightly charred, but not completely black. 
5. Stuff your peppers and top with guac sauce.

Guac sauce

• 1 avocado
• juice of 1 lime (or lemon)
• 1/4 c cilantro leaves
• 2 T salsa

1. Put in blender and puree. 
   
   
   
   E called them "little guacamole volcanoes." The acidity of the sauce is kind of important, so if you make this without the gauc sauce, top it with salsa at least. If I wasn't dairy free at the moment, Greek yogurt definitely would have been involved.
   
   
   This morning I was late on taking my pro biotic, I still haven't eaten, but I sliced up this pink lady apple and scooped 1 T of peanut butter for breakfast... and have been waiting for the last 24 minutes to eat it. You're supposed to wait 30 minutes before eating. 
   
   
   
   Cleanse day 5
   
   
   157.4
   
   
   I guess it couldn't keep dropping forever. I'll keep track of my meals and post them in tomorrow's post. Happy Friday everyone!

Cleanse day 4

Oh the pain. Sweet merciful baby Jesus... THE PAIN.

I could hardly sleep last night because I couldn't find a position that didn't hurt. I am sore in every major muscle group and a couple of minors. Moral of the story, don't hop into the weight room after 2 months break, thinking you can conquer the world. I am apparently not Wonder Woman. This is very unfortunate news for me.

First of all, I've realized that I've neglected a few things.

1. The kale chips. They were better than the zucchini ones, much crispier, but I still didn't really like them. E did, he said they tasted like toasted pumpkin seeds.
2. Recipes: first of all, most of the things I make either come from the brain storage or roughly from a website, but I wanted to give you a tip or two.

Macadamia nut crusted halibut

• 1 lb halibut (4 servings)
• can coconut milk
• 1/4 c. macadamia nuts
• 1/2 c shredded unsweetened coconut
• 1/2 c. brown rice flour
• S&P

1. Preheat oven to 375º. Soak halibut in coconut milk for at least 30 minutes. Notes: You can also add honey (not cleanse approved) and salt to this mixture. You will not be using all of the coconut milk for this, but I imagine you could find a recipe for creamy coconut rice or a sweet sauce, if you didn't want to waste it

2. Use a food processor of blender to uniformly chop macadamia nuts and shredded coconut. Add salt.

3. Add brown rice to nut mixture.

4. Prepare an oven safe dish, with either wax paper or a spray of oil. 

5. Take halibut from coconut mixture, directly to breading, and into pan.

6. Bake 10-15 minutes in center of oven or until tender (flakes with a fork).

Yesterday I made simple grilled salmon:

• 6 oz salmon fillet
• dill
• small lemon, 1/2 sliced, 1/2 to squeeze
• 1/2 tsp sliced/minced garlic
• S&P

1. Leave the skin on and place it on enough foil to wrap it. 
2. S&P generously.
3. Squeeze some lemon juice on top. 
4. Place lemon slices, dill and garlic on top, and wrap.
5. Then I grill at a med-high heat for about 10-15 minutes. 

I made 2 meals out of this salmon. I had it yesterday with grilled veggies and this morning in a salmon hash of sorts. Bell pepper, red onion, garlic and plenty of dill, topped with an over easy egg. 23 g of protein this morning? Why not? It was tasty and felt quite decadent. That's also some carrot/orange juice on the side. Fave juice ever, but has tons of natural sugar in it, so it's definitely a treat.

I have to tell you, I think it's a pain in the ass to cook with minimal oil/butter. I mean, I'm no Paula Dean (thank heavens), but I think that butter makes the world go round. I recognize this is a problem. 

Last night, making a steak without butter, seemed a little upsetting. But I put a healthy dose of salt, pepper and garlic powder to compensate. I then threw it on a hot hot grill and grilled each side for 5 minutes. This was an inch thick fillet, so with some cuts, you'll need less time per side. Ours turned out to be a perfect medium, just how we both like it. 

I asked E what he wanted with his steak, he replied "Mashed potatoes and gravy!!!" 

To which I answered. "Ha... ha. Not funny."

But I got a little creative. I have made many a cauliflower mash in the past, but without dairy, it was a little tricky. It turned out, but there are a couple of tweaks I would make in the future.

Vegan cauliflower mash

      serves 6, as a side dish

• 1 head cauliflower
• 1/2 diced onion (I used sweet onion)
• paprika
• garlic powder
• unsweetened soy milk
• 1/2 avocado
• S&P 

1. Preheat oven (or grill) to 400º
2. Cut cauliflower into uniform chunks.
3. Place on foil or cookie sheet.
4. Sprinkle generously with garlic powder, paprika and S&P.
5. Roast for about 15-20 minutes, should be golden in spots, but not burnt.
6. Place in blender with avocado and gradually add soy milk for desired consistency. Estimated close to a cup. 

If I make it this way again, I will use veggie stock for half of the soy milk. I like soy, but the taste of it was coming through a little more than I would like. E really enjoyed it. I thought it did the job for a mashed potato sub. If you're into this, but want the butter, cheese and milk... it's even more naughtily delicious.

So, onto the nitty gritty. I actually laughed out loud when I stepped on the scale this morning. 

Cleanse Day 3

156.8

• 1st meal: pro biotic restore capsules, 1/2 personal watermelon, 24 oz water
• 2nd meal: salmon hash, egg and carrot orange juice

Clearly I haven't eaten the other meals yet... but I will fill you in tomorrow.

I got some further affirmation when E looked at me this morning and said, "Your stomach is looking much flatter." 

That always feels good. It also means that I'm getting back to my normal bod. I am 4.8lbs off of my all time low, I'm super stoked to surpass it. 

I have been noticing the last few days that I have been REALLY tired. E thinks that it's because of the detoxing and upon researching, I realize that he's probably right. Now add that every inch of my body aches and I think that amounts to an uneventful day. Could I be anymore boring? At least I showered today.

You're welcome.

Cleanse Day 3

Hey y'all. I read too many Texan blogs.

I can't tell you how much I would like to open a bottle of wine right now.

Luckily, the headache did not hang on through the much needed 11 hours of sleep I had last night. I still have some minor pain and sensitivity, but lately it seems to never goes away. Getting to the gym felt great. I decided to hit the weight room because it has been forever. It's weird not really knowing the weights I should be working at. I have lost a significant amount of strength in the last couple of months, but it's all good. I'll get it back. Tomorrow, however, I will be incredibly sore.

I attempted a run on the treadmill post-lifting, but failed epically. I hadn't had enough to eat for that much lifting and did not have the energy to run. Resulted in a one mile run and a lot of stretching.

Cleanse day 3

158.6

• 1st meal: fiber drink, 1/2 Think Thin protein bar
• 2nd meal: banana
• 3rd meal: salad with 4 oz grilled salmon, grilled vegetables and a cheat tablespoon of Yumm sauce
• 4th meal: 1 c strawberries, 1 c raw carrots and cucumbers with rice vinegar, 1/4 c raw almonds
• 5th meal: a lot of grilled cabbage.... like... at least a quarter of a head
• 6th meal: grilled filet mingon (whoops! not lean, oh well) and a side salad

As you can see, trying to stay away from the rice and legumes as I've had quite a bit of both the first 2 days of cleansing. I can feel it in my energy though. I don' know how people pull off low carb.

I'm pretty sleepy. I've been awake for less than 12 hours. Something is wrong with me. Maybe it's just PMS!?

I don't have anything interesting to say. Hopefully the fact that I've lost over 3 lbs in 3 days on this cleanse has given you some sort of satisfaction. Peace out.

Cleanse Day 2

160.4

I hate that number so much. I have been in the 150s for about a year, and these last couple of months, dancing on this 160 line is pissing me off. Luckily in a couple more days it will be gone again. I'm getting excited to make it into the 140s. I think I will just keep pushing until I get there this time, and hold onto it for dear life.

People are really worked up about Miley Cyrus right now. In my opinion, her VMAs performance was just bad. She looked bad, she sounded bad, her whole production was just BAD. It was no more or less provocative than some Rihanna or Lady Gaga performances. She's 20 years old, if she wants to be an idiot, sounds like her burden to bear.

Moving on.

Last night I went to bed with a headache, I couldn't get to sleep. So I didn't make it out to the hike this morning. Unfortunately, my headache is still holding on. I regularly get cluster headaches in the afternoon... Not normally in the morning. Also not usually bad enough to make me nauseated. I think maybe one day without sugar, wine, caffeine, dairy and gluten has made it clear to me that I have some dependencies. I feel really yucky.

I want to make it to the gym today, but with this headache... I don't know what I can accomplish.

3 hrs later...

I have started laundry, given the dog a bath and walk, done some light yoga... still not feeling up to par. I also tried making some microwave zucchini chips. Epic fail. The chip craving lives on, so there are currently kale "chips" with sea salt and garam masala in the oven. Hopefully these will at least be crispy.

Today is a maje cleanse trial fail day. First, I thought I would start off my day with a delicious fruit and veggie "smoothie." I should have looked up a recipe. There was so much kale and pulp that I was chewing the damn thing. I still drank it, but it was not good. Also, I'm about 98% sure I broke the blender.

Next I tried the zucchini chips. I was hungry and wanted salty/crispy so I looked up recipes, but all of them took over an hour, so I tried the microwave recipe. Very soggy. Very salty. Mostly I just ate soggy salty zucchini with hummus on top. I am learning how much I hate to waste fresh produce.

Now I have kale in the oven. I already feel like I'm going to hate it.

We have some friends coming over to eat delicious alaskan halibut, which I'll be cooking. Thinking of doing it 2 ways. One way on the grill with a fresh avocado and nectarine salsa and then a macadamia coconut crusted one. I will probably not eat the 2nd mentioned, because I will fry it for them. Tastier. I plan to make a brown rice side and some grilled veggies also.

My fridge is packed to the brim with produce, lets see how much of it ends up in compost.

I also have been slacking on the water intake a bit. I am at about 50 oz and it's already 2:30pm. Guess I better try harder!

Cleanse day 2:

160.4 lbs

• 1st meal: fiber drink and nasty smoothie (1/2 banana, 1/2 apple, 3 stalks kale, carrot juice, orange juice, 3 strawberries)
• 2nd meal: gross zucchini "chips" and hummus
• 3rd meal: 1/2 pink lady apple and peanut butter, 1 c sliced cucumber
• 4th meal: inevitably disgusting kale "chips"
• 5th meal: undecided
• 6th meal: grilled halibut, fruit salsa and grilled veggies

Cleanse Day 1

Hello friends!

First, I want to let you know how the race went on Saturday. I didn't sleep, hardly at all the night before. I was anxious because it was my first ever race. I arrived late, of course. I was also $5 short on my registration... talk about being unprepared. I was the last person to leave the gates at 7:12 am and made my way. I must have been in a hurry to catch up to some folks, because I finished my first mile in just over 8 minutes. Unfortunately, the chip in my bib wasn't started at the right time. So I didn't even print out my results, it claimed that I completed my 10k in 1:18, but I left at 7:12 am and was back no later than 8:20, but probably a little bit earlier. I felt really good about it. My body just kind of took over, and there were no shin splints or charlie horses, it wasn't too hot and I just enjoyed myself.

So that's good. Not to start training for a half. There is one coming up on October 20th called "The Run Like Hell" and it's Halloween themed, and encourages runners to dress up. Which could be AWESOME. I am not fully committed yet, but I am researching training schedules.

Cleanse day 1.

I should preface that I ate Chinese food for about 4 meals over the weekend. I also ate a Costco muffin and finished my pre-cleanse binge with about 15 glasses of pinot, creamy mushroom pasta and ficoccia bread. I am very well behaved and also super bloated, so it was no surprise to me, 3 days before my monthly visit and with a lack of #2 today, that my day 1 weigh in was...

161.8lbs.

Apparently my body is keen on that number.

The eats went as such:

• 1st meal: fiber drink, 1 c. strawberries, 24 oz water
• 2nd meal: 1 whole egg and 2 egg whites with asparagus, onion, tomato, tarragon, garlic powder and S&P
• 3nd meal: 1/2 c blueberries, serving baby carrots, tuna with stone ground mustard, craisins and raw cashews, 24 oz water
• 4rd meal: 1/2 Think Thin white chocolate protein bar, 1/2 banana
• 5th meal: Wasabi seaweed snacks 24 oz water
• 6th meal: Lentil stew and whole grain brown rice, 24 oz of water

Lentil Stew recipe

    Serves about 6

• 2 large tomatoes, large dice
• 2 nectarines, large dice
• 1 sweet onion, large dice
• 1 medium egg plant, large dice
• 1 t coconut oil
• 1.5 c lentils
• 1/2 c raisins (golden are preferred)
• 2 c Veg stock
• 2 c water
• 1 t garam masala
• 1/4 t chili powder
• 1 t salt
• 1/4 t cayenne pepper
• 1/4 t cloves
• 1/2 ground thyme

1. Saute onion with coconut oil, add spices and bloom for 2-3 minutes.
2. Add lentils, saute for 3-5 minutes.
3. Add tomatoes, nectarines, egg plant, raisins, vegetable stock and water.
4. Cover and simmer 30-45 minutes, or until lentils are soft. Add more liquid if it becomes dry, and salt to taste.

This is pretty easy to make, just has to cook for a while. E and I really enjoyed this, especially since it was a rainy and chilly day. Autumn decided to make a visit, I truly hope it's only a visit though. I'm not done with summer. 

I am very thankful for the rain though. The fire risk has been HIGH all summer since it's been so dry and these forest fires have been unstoppable. I'm thankful that our firefighters are getting some help in the form of inches of rain.

I haven't worked out since the run and it's been a lovely break. Tomorrow morning, I am going to hike Angel's rest with a couple of friends. E has expressed a desire to start going to the gym with me... I am interested to see how that pans out. I do need to get in there and start lifting. Miss it.

Day 1: success.

Friends.

I don't want to be a poor friend. I mean, I'm always going to be poor, but I could at least be a good friend that's poor. You get what I'm saying.

We all have weaknesses and shortcomings, that's the essence of humanity. Imperfection. We are imperfectly perfect individuals, but that is no excuse for lack of effort. Every instant is an opportunity to better oneself.

I have many beautiful, inspiring, intelligent, hilarious and kind hearted friends. Each one of them, I value sincerely. My relationships with each of them are so unique. Through the fire and back, they have stuck with me, nurtured me, laughed with me and cried with me. I honestly can't say that I would be breathing today with out them. My girlfriends have been everything and more, in times that I was slipping into nothingness.

I don't always show them how much I value them. I have a tendency to be flaky and self centered. I have a habit of bringing a conversation about them, to me. I honestly care for their predicament, I just find that it's easiest for me to connect when I relate, but it's still not ok. I also tend to get involved in situations that aren't mine. I wouldn't say I'm a pot-stirrer per-say, but I am a fixer. Sometimes things aren't mine to fix and my good intentions swiftly become a whole new mess. There are certain habits I have that I am not proud of and I hate how they affect the people I love. So with utmost humility, I am attempting to tackle these shortcomings.

Good intentions don't erase mistakes. Just because you don't mean to hurt or neglect someone, doesn't mean you haven't.

Also, don't text conversations that tone of voice is important. :) I can't tell you how many times I have text/said something lighthearted via text and it is read/heard in a not so flattering tone. Technology. The death of interpersonal relationships.

To my gal pals: I love you. I appreciate you and everything you have done to contribute to my life. You have more value than any possession (including my new car) and I am sorry for any time I have made you feel unloved, disrespected or pushed too hard. I would be devastated to lose a single one of you. You are cherished.

Could I BE anymore cheesy? But really, I mean it. You knock my socks off. As does Rose.

Anyway, I'm running a 10k tomorrow. Let's hope I don't die!

If you need me today, I'll be busy laying about, hydrating and doing light yoga.

Cleansy Things, Compost and In-laws.

Alrighty friends, I didn't put recipes in, because that seems like a lot of work for one post, so instead I've listed ideas and as the cleanse progresses, I will post the food of the day and any recipes needed.

The nice thing about cleansing, is that the food is clean and simple. So there shouldn't be anything too complicated.

Cleanse rules via advocare site:

  1   NO fried foods, refined sugars, corn or white starches, or bread

  2   NO wheat products (i.e. bread, crackers) 

  3   NO dairy (i.e. cheese, yogurt, milk) 

  4   NO alcohol (you’re on a cleanse...hold off for 10 days)

  5   NO coffee or soda (drink water or SPARK...this will reduce inflammation)

  6   EAT VEGGIES: salads during the day and steamed at night will scrub your system

               (choose spices over dairy/sugar based condiments) 

  7   EAT FRUIT: fibrous an low glycemic choices (apples, grapefruit, berries) 

  8   EAT HEALTHY FATS (i.e. avocado, nuts/seeds, olives/olive oil) 

  9   EAT CLEAN PROTEINS: feed muscle and reduce appetite (tuna and salmon will aid in cleansing;

                eggs/chicken would be secondary options; stay away from processed lunch meats) 

 10   EAT CLEAN CARBS: (i.e. rice, hummus, oatmeal... if needed) ]

   DRINK WATER! (Goal = 1 gallon, or 4 liters, per day)

Snack Ideas:

• hard boiled eggs
• all natural jerky
• raw vegetables (personal faves: being: zucchini, cucumber, carrots)
• fruit (personal faves: berries, bananas, peaches, melon)
• all natural peanut or cashew butter with apples or carrots
• raw almonds

Breakfast ideas:

• Scrambles: 1 whole egg, 2 whites and vegetables
• oatmeal (not minute oats) with peaches
• Think Thin protein bars (personal fave flaves: white chocolate and cookies'n'cream)
• vegetable/fruit juices (no preservatives, dairy or added sugar)

Lunch:

    

      I mostly eat leftovers from dinner for lunch, but other ideas:

• tuna salad with craisins, raw cashews, curry powder, onion and a little vegennaise
• salad, salad salad.
• salads with leftover protein from dinner
• grilled vegetables and chicken
• lettuce wraps

Dinner:

• vegetarian stuffed bell peppers 
• stuffed zucchini with lean ground beef and tomatoes
• brown rice with chicken, pineapple, onions
• grilled salmon 
• turkey meat loaf
• curried lentil stew, brown rice
• lean steak
• spaghetti squash with marinara and chicken
• halibut
• pork kebabs

I haven't stocked my fridge yet, because it's too soon. I will most likely go on Sunday so that everything is fresh and have to make at least one (but more likely two) trips to the produce market throughout.

Speaking of produce. I'm excited to announce that I'm composting again! We found a great system that's super easy, doesn't smell, and doesn't take up a bunch of space. Wanna know about it? I know you're suuuuuuper into being green and organic. Get ready! It's called Bokashi. It's basically a happy family of bacteria, fungi, protozoa, rotifers and actinomycetes that accelerate the breaking down of waste. We just bought a 5 gallon bucket and put raw compostables in there, after a layer of waste, you sprinkle a layer of Bokashi. It's nice because I don't have to hike out to the compost bin. Since it controls unpleasant odor, I can keep it right in the kitchen. We've been at it for about 2 weeks. If you eat a lot of produce, I recommend composting. It cuts down on your garbage bags and feeds your (or someone else's) garden. If you're interested, there is a company in Southern Oregon that makes it. Their website sucks, but there's tons on info on the interweb about it.

This evening, E's parents are coming over for the first time ever. We've (I've) been meaning to have them over for dinner for a while, but he's not easily persuaded. I'm kind of nervous. I don't have the closest relationship with them yet (I know it's pathetic, we've been together over 2 years), but I'd like to. I really do miss having parents, when you get down to the plain and simple. It's a rich relationship that can't be replaced. There are definitely some of my elders that do a great job making me feel loved, but no one takes care of you like your mama. I know that relationships can't be forced and they aren't always easy or fun, but at very least, I would like them to know who I am. Not just the surfacey stuff, but to have a good sense of my character and my heart. I anticipate that E's parents will be my in-laws... I would really like to bond with them.

Now comes all the nervous energy though. They're serious wine connoisseurs. I don't know what kind of wine to get!!! I also don't know what to make for dinner!!! I thought I might keep it casual and make pulled pork, but now I'm thinking I should show off some culinary skill and make something fancy. I don't know. I don't usually get nervous to host, but I'm sure some of you can relate.

So, I'm off to the store. I know it's hot to bake a pie, but I'm going to do that too. Wish me luck!

New shews.

This is where I'm blogging from today. The desk in the guest bedroom, with my post run hydration, half a personal melon and a big ole' cup of water. I love those personal melons... so shweet.

I bit the bullet and bought new kicks. It's late for breaking in shoes, but I figure "Hey, it's only 6.2 miles. Right?! I went into Dick's Sporting Goods in search of a more affordable running shoe. I jogged around in a few, but these feet only want Brooks. More specifically Brooks Ghost. I have been running in Brooks Ghosts before they were called Ghosts and now they're on their 6th generation. I love them because I can go longer distances without any discomfort in calves/shins/hamstrings, but I hate them because they only come in mom colors. For once I would like a pair of fun bright neon shoes or something.

I picked them up last night and did 2 miles of normal jogging and then 10 minutes of 1min x 1min sprints. I'm a little out of condition because I took so much time off, but like I said before... it's only 6.2 miles, right?!

You know, running is great. It's a full body work out. It has a huge friendly community. You don't need a gym membership. It offers different levels of difficulty just by tweaking things like speed, elevation, intervals, road vs. trail... it's great. But it's hard. Most folks don't just wake up one morning and think, "I haven't run in a year, I think I'll just tick of 5 miles today. No biggie." It's not something that remains in good condition if you neglect it. It takes devotion and the capacity to push yourself. If you always run the same pace, on the same terrain, you won't improve. I wonder a lot, if I have the personality to be a runner. I'm not the most ambitious of people and I have a hard time making myself do something I don't feel like doing. I keep thinking that at some point it will be effortless to have a quick 5 mile run, but that's just not true. It gets easier, for sure. I've already experienced that, but I'm not to the point where a run gets me pumped up. I enjoy exercise. I like what it does for my mood, appetite,  stamina and body. The point of a good work out, is for it to always be a challenge. So I suppose I need a mind adjustment.

It should never be easy. Easy = Bad. Hard = Good.

That's not an equation my brain is comfortable with.

Along with my new shoes, I picked up a handy-dandy runnin' cap. I look silly in baseball caps. Spare your jabs. This one is from Target. It's breathable, has UV protection and a cooling sweat band. I gotta tell ya, it's nice to run without sunglasses and no sweat in your eyes. I also got some headbands and some moisturizer.

I am going to plan out my meals for the cleanse today and do some grocery shopping. They key to success is planning! I have been splurging, knowing that the cleanse is around the corner and I have cheated the shit out of these cleanses before. This time I want to do it right. So my blog tomorrow with consist of the meal plan, grocery list and recipes if you are interested in doing it along with me.

I hope you all are doing well and enjoying the beautiful weather!

aaaaand here is a cute picture of E eating a milkshake. I'm a lucky gal.

Running Injuries and Peanut Butter Bars.

I'm over apologizing and explaining why I don't blog more often. I hope you don't mind. Like I've said in the last few, give me a couple more weeks of summer. School routine will kick my butt right back into gear.

I got a new car and then promptly left society with Amy to camp/break in my car/scratch my car/ lose my phone/drink too much. We went camping at Timothy Lake on Tuesday and I returned yesterday (Saturday). Aside from the aforementioned hurdles, it was a relaxing trip. There were quite a few bees, though. I didn't manage to get stung but Lígo did, kind of a lot actually.

Here's the clincher folks:

13 mile hike.

That's right! Amy and I did it up like athletes and hiked the Pacific Crest trail and around Timothy lake in a whopping 4.5 hours. We hiked a half marathon. It was beautiful, and not too challenging until the last 2 miles. You see, being the silly girls we are, we did not bring a back pack camping. Therefore, there was no food or water packing of the sort. We had 24 oz of water (to share) and 2 granola bars. It tided us over, but it's fair to say that we were spent upon returning to the campground. As was pup.

Amy made a lot of peanut butter bars though, so don't worry, I fixed up that calorie deficit REAL quick like.

I have a problem. A pickle really.

I have been getting shin splints and calf cramping when I run. Even veeeery short distances. This is strange, because I have been running off and on for a while and haven't experienced a shin splint in over 3 years. So, as per doctor's orders (doctor being E) I rested up. Then we did the 13 miler and all of the sudden I haven't run in over a week. Convenient too, because that 10k is on Saturday. Am I royally screwed? I don't think so. Will I be able to run the whole thing in an hour? Probably not. Do I need a new pair of running shoes? Definitely. I think it's a little late to break in a new pair, so I'm hoping I can just deal with it and the adrenaline will push me through, I'm also hoping that all the rest I've been getting will put me back in fine form. After I post this, I will be headed out for a 3 miler on the waterfront. I'll let you know how that goes.

My oldest gal pal and bestie, Bethany May, is headed into town this weekend! I could not be more thrilled. Even if it means I have to whoop it up at the Wild Hare in Canby for the night. She lives in Colorado and I don't get to see her but a couple days a year, so, I'm pumped. I want to go visit her for Spring Break this year, if she'll have me. ;)

In other news: Yes, I got a new car. Yes, I love it. Yes, I scratched the shit out of it already. No, I haven't weighed myself. I hope the number's not growing.

Since I lost another phone, in no truer Jacob fashion, I lost all the wonderful photos I took to put in this posting. I won't be buying a new phone until the new iphone comes out and makes the iphone 5 super cheap. It will be a great day when I return to modern society.

Oh, and lastly, I start my cleanse on Monday, August 26th! You can join me if you like, by ordering the 10-day cleanse from my favorite Advocare rep, Michelle from Shape Up or Ship Out.

Trying new things and scale update.

Soooooo... I know I need to get the scale hidden again, but I felt completely wrong about a 10 lb weight gain, so I stepped on the scale again today.

Sorry to disappoint you all, but I weighed in at 159lbs this morning. On an empty stomach and so forth. This is probably more accurate. Instead of a 10lb gain, it's only 7 pounds. Really, it's 7 lbs of fat. Since I haven't been lifting and have only been doing about 80 push ups and 10 minutes of ab work a week, for strength training. My muscle mass is declining, while my weight is increasing. Because I'm doing things like eating chinese food at 9:30 pm and putting cheese on everything. 

Everything is better with cheese. 

Moving on...

On Monday I did my EZ run for 45 minutes, per the running schedule. It was AWESOME. I think it was the best run I've ever had. I ran at an average of 6.1 mph. Which means, if I can keep it up, I will complete the 10k in an hour. In 45 minutes I ran 4.6 miles. EZ-ly. Afterward I was famished and went to sushi. At which, I ordered tuna and salmon sushi without rice, this is the only way to eat sushi for me anymore. If you eat 4 plates off the track, that are rolls, you're eating about a cup of white rice. White rice = a whole lot of nothing but calories. About 300 calories, no nutrition, not including: sauces, fish and wonderful things like cream cheese and avocado. Eating sashimi is less than half the calories of eating rolls. So if you like it? Order it.

Yesterday, I WENT GOLFING. 

It was weird. I've never golfed more than put put when I was in Jr. High. I have friends that love it, my dad played it every once in a while, but I've never stepped food on a golf course. E and I went with a couple of friends yesterday to an executive course, it was HOT. I am not very good at trying new things. Especially when I'm not feeling confident. I didn't want to be a poor sport. You read the post about being the chubby kid who couldn't physically do things other kids could, yeah. I don't want to live like that. Despite my strong desire to watch, I participated. 

I wasn't any good, I think I got one bogie. It was a fun day though. It's always nice to do something different. As much as we love to sit on the back porch and play cards, getting outside and trying something out of the ordinary keeps you flexible, keeps it fresh. 

After Golf we went to a bar for dinner. A bar that serves chinese food. I lost $5 on video lottery, gave my stomach sufficient grease for the year, came home, went straight to bed.

Today I have 2.5 miles on the schedule. I will either wait until evening or go to the gym this afternoon. The 10k is coming right up.

I am headed to the coast tomorrow afternoon for the Seaside Volleyball Tournament, which E is playing in. It will be a nice weekend away, I'm excited for clams... :)

Have a good day.

Liebster Award

I was nominated by a friend for the Liebster Award. This is an award for up and coming bloggers who have less than 200 followers. Which is me! There are a few steps to go through, so here goes!

1. Link the blogger who nominated you.

          Michelle @ Shape Up or Ship Out

2. You must answer 10 questions given to you by your nominee.

1. What is your favorite cardio exercise? 

My favorite cardio exercise changed all the time. I think the key to enjoying cardio is to switching it up. I am currently on a running kick.

2. What type of music do you listen to? Fave song? Fave band?

I listen to a lot of different kinds of music. Lately I have been jamming out to Matchbox 20, but I am  big Beyoncé fan. "Grown Woman" by Beyoncé or "Royals" by Lorde at the moment.

3. Harry Potter, Twilight, or The Hunger Games?

This is an unfair question and I refuse to answer it.

4. What is your favorite fashion trend right now?

I really dig the hi-lo look and also am enjoying the bando bra, eazy breezy look.

5. What's one piece of advice that you would give your younger self?

You're not going to marry every guy you date, just get over that RIGHT NOW.

6. Do you wash your make up off before bed every night?

No. I would say about 50% of the time my face gets the treatment it deserves. 

7. Would you rather have no fingers or no toes (think seriously about the repercussions here)?

No toes. I could figure out how to balance, right? I need these fingers!

8. Favorite chapstick/lip balm/lipstick?

Face Stockholm "Smile"

9. Do you think Brad Pitt is a slime bucket?

Honestly? I don't care. If I really thought about it, I'm sure I could formulate an opinion, but it's really none of my business what happened with him, Jen and Angelina. I don't know them!

10. What is your favorite thing about yourself?

Strength.

3. You must choose 10 bloggers to be nominated for the award. Unfortunately, I don't know many!

          

           Michelle @ The Copper Collective

           Brandy @ basicallybrandy 

           Merrie @ Skinny Student

           Susan @ {not so} Suddenly Susan

           Natalie @ Girl vs. Flab

          
4. You must come up with 10 questions you want your nominees to answer.

1. Weights or yoga?

2. Cats or dogs?

3. What's your favorite workout?

4. What's your favorite summer activity?

5. What is your go to meal when you're having guests?

6. What's your food weakness?

7. What, do you feel, is your greatest accomplishment?

8. Are you more like your mother or father?

9.  Do you watch any embarrassing TV shows? If so, which?

10. What is your definition of beauty?

5. Once you do this, you must go to their blogs and let them know you nominated them.

Beasts, Boats and Body Image.

E surprised me with the most wonderful and romantic date I have ever been on, on Thursday night. He took me to a restaurant in NE Portland, called Beast. I had no idea he had made a reservation here, I had no idea what we were doing, we just got dressed up and he drove me to an undisclosed location. Folks, I cried. It was a 6 course meal with wine pairings and surely a high price tag, but something I will never forget. I felt like the most lucky and loved woman in the whole world. We were also that couple. That couple that makes you want to barf because they're constantly gazing into each others eyes and stealing kisses at every opportunity. I could care less though, because we're in love and that's what people do when they're in love. Here's some photos from our special night.

On Friday morning, I had a run with Amy on the waterfront

On Saturday, Michelle came up and we took her and Brandon out on the boat.

we tubed

I wakeboarded (so did Brandon, but I don't have a photo!)

It was a good day. Probably ate too much, probably drank too much...

Sometimes it seems like everything is a good idea, and you've got it under control. I have maintained a weight from 152-156lbs for 2 years. I have been noticing that my body has been a little extra squishy lately, but didn't think much of it. I don't like to worry about the number, but yesterday I just had to know. Because I'm an idiot.

I weighed in at a svelte 162lbs. Given, there are a lot of factors involved, such as having just eaten, being bloated from a day of drinking, just getting off my period, etc. But this is not a number I enjoy looking at. It's not a testament of my life change. It doesn't depict the work I put in to get healthy.

I've been plain lazy. I was too confident in my ability to live carefree and also continue getting closer to my goal weight. Where I was once only 12 lbs from... now I'm 22lbs from it. This is a set back. A minor one, but it is making me really sit back and evaluate the choices I've been making for the past 2 months. How I've been feeling (not good), how much water I've been drinking (not enough), and now to repercussions of said choices. The biggest issue here that I am constantly checking myself on, is how it's affecting my sense of well being. I get depressed. It affects my desire to socialize, exercise and just overall, be a good partner and friend. I am a believer in, "If you don't like it, change it." I know that's a lot easier said than done, but getting in motion is the first step. I could sit around, keep eating my feelings and gain more or I can make a choice TODAY, to get back to the person I want to be.

I like me. I know a lot about exercise and nutrition. I enjoy these things. It's only when I get lazy that I forget.

So I ordered the Advocare 10 day cleanse and am excited to get back on track. Once it arrives, I will give you a play by play of how it's working out.

Speaking of working out, I am registering to take both yoga and weight lifting through the college in the fall. Summer is great and all, but I think most of you can agree with me when I say that we thrive on routine. It is just going through the motions during the school year. Wake up, hydrate, work out, eat, shower, class, eat, class, eat, class, eat and sleep. There is less social eating and drinking involved. I get better sleep, at reasonable hours. I don't consume 1000 calories of vodka or wine on a random Wednesday night.

I never thought I would say this, but I'm pumped to not drink for 10 days. Maybe I'll go through with the whole 24 day challenge. I kind of doubt it, but maybe!

Anyway, time to give the dog a bath, hit the gym and do some grocery shopping. I hope you all get through this Monday alive. :)

Fat girl feelings

Lately, I just haven't felt like it.

You know how sometimes you just fall of the wagon? I had always been good about finding a balance and making sure I don't deprive myself, but I am just eating whatever I want and not thinking about it. Luckily I have a no weigh policy, but I can see my body changing and I'm not super keen on it. I'm thinking it may me time to return to MyFitnessPal to get my self back in order.

It's a constant battle. Fighting off fat girl feelings. It's like everything is going along fine and I'm feeling good and BAM! Depressed. I don't see in the mirror what all of you see. So I am constantly evaluating my sense of self. Constantly working toward self-awareness.

Just have to keep reminding myself that it's not a big deal. I will get back on track and have been thinking lately, it might be getting time to get serious and kick those last 12 lbs to the curb. I've been hanging out about this weight for a year and it's great to maintain, but it's just time. I will let you know when that fun process starts.

On the topic of eating nothing and working out a lot, I made awesome dinner last night.

Rachel's Chicken Korma

2 chicken breast (cut to 1 inch cubes)
1 jar Curry simmer sauce (I got mine at Trader Joe's)
1/2 onion (large dice)
2 peaches (large dice)
1 tomato   (large dice)
1/2 c raisins
1/2 c raw cashews
1/4 c cashew butter
1 T coconut oil
1 can low fat coconut milk
Curry powder
Garam Masala
Salt and pepper (I used cayenne)

1. Put chicken pieces and raisins in a bowl and season with curry powder, garam masala, salt and pepper. Set aside.
2. Heat coconut oil in pan, add onion and cashews. Sauté until onions are golden and cashews are roasted.
3. Add chicken and raisins, brown at med-high heat.
4. Add curry sauce, coconut milk and cashew butter. Simmer for 10 minutes.
5. Add peaches and tomatoes, simmer for 5 ore minutes and serve.

I served mine with faux tzaziki (greek yogurt with cucumber, no herbs), mango chutney, cous cous and naan, and I want more in my belly already. It's not often that I am wiling to openly brag about about meals, but I REALLY enjoyed this, as did E and our guest, Erika. I know there are a lot of obscure ingredients in there, but the spices are great to have around, I always cook with coconut oil and cashew butter is so tasty, expensive, but worth it.

Today, I pick up Bernita, go to Les Schwab and get her tires and brakes checked. Then I hang the key off to E and let him do his thang. Starting to feel real now, that things are going to be taken care of soon and some financial freedom is around the corner = iphone 5 and a trip to the dentist! I never thought I could look forward to the dentist this much, and I won't like it once I see the bill, but I'm ready to start the process.

Bulimics avoid the dentist like the plague. I am no longer bulimic, but I was for many years. I never saw a dentist. I take care of my teeth now, but I know that 6+ years without a cleaning is not a good thing, especially since my wisdom teeth are still in there and screwing everything up. I'm embarrassed that I've been so reckless about my teeth, I will pay for it now.

It's feeling an awful lot like a clean slate in my life right now. It's a good feeling.

E and I are going to Seaside, OR next Thursday for a couple of nights. He's playing in the volleyball tournament and I'm tagging along. I was going to take puppy, because our hotel is pet friendly, but I wouldn't be comfortable leaving him in the hotel room alone when we go out to dinner and such. Anyone want to puppy sit??? :)

Summer is good.